For a little bit over 10 years I have been witnessing that. A person that is so dear to me, let's call her Kadie, has been living like that ever since I knew her. As a young girl she went through a lot of pain, suffering and hardship. Not having a father and being away from her mother to attend boarding school, she quickly learned to be her own parent and care racket. Naturally, she has developed a certain hard outer shell that doesn't disclose her core in anyway. Kadie learned to protect herself by being strong, hard, disciplined and distant. And she went far with it: she became a very successful business woman, mother of three. Her husband formed of a similar calibre speaks her emotional language. Recently they purchases a house in an affluent area and decided to add another vehicle to their collection. Financially speaking, Kadie is doing just fine. Emotionally, she is a complete wreck. From her early experiences as a young girl, she derived that life is not valuable of you haven't suffered to her whew you are , that once made a mistake one need to suffer from the consequences in order to pay for what has happened, regardless if the mistake made was her fault or not. She demanded and took full control over everything she was involved because she hardly trusts anyone and believes that only she can do things right. And with all this came even more, issues that were more complex to explain.

So Kadie has a younger sister. Lore is much  younger than Kadie, so much more that when Lore was born Kadie was old enough to care for her and partly raise her, when their mother had to travel the world to earn bread for the house. With that deep memory, Kadie developed a very natural but also stagnant relationship to her younger sister Lore. As Lore grew up, changing from baby to child, from child to teenager, from teenager to a young adult, Kadie could not keep track with the growth let alone changes and rather chose to look at her as a little child forever instead. This decision took a great toll on the relationship of the sisters and would affect one more than the other. Both being girls, it is only natural that completion, rivalry and jealousy develops over time, however, with Kadie's insistence on her Lore being a child and this not deserving the treatment of an adult, situations often times escalated  between them.

For Lore, a young, dynamic, independent and intelligent woman, being treated like this by her sister whom she looks up to, admires and respects from the bottom of her heart, was incomprehensible, both on a metal such as emotional level. Often time Lore to the challenge upon herself to straighten out things, to make her sister change her view point and allow space to start looking at her differently. Mostly in vain. 

Lore would make minor mistakes and Kadie would reply:"This is exactly why I treat you like a child, because you do things like this!". Meanwhile, when Kadie was Lore's age, one could say she was slightly off the rails, whereas Lore has hardly ever been seriously drunk.

Lore's biggest issue is that she truly loves her sister but knows that I'd they weren't sisters they wouldn't even look at each other. And that all she ever wanted from her sister is to be respected and accepted. However, she has come to the conclusion that this is another wish yet to come true. For now she will have distance and time do the work, as all her direct inputs have failed and even backfired. Moreover, she trusts in the LORD that he will help her sort this our for her.